What are MEN looking for in a WOMAN

I found this article interesting about what guys want and this was written by a woman. Shockingly, it was right on the dot of what this woman said. I know its a little off topic but i think it's a good read up. :)

Either read it here in this blog or from the source: http://elitedaily.com/dating/gentlemen/guys/

Many women nowadays are under the misconception that since guys have their pick of women, the majority will go for the leggy, perfect 10 supermodel types.

How wrong you are ladies. Sure, there will always be dudes out there who are modelizers, the ones that bat above their average and seek perfection. However, the majority of men out there are just looking for a normal, sane girl who likes to kick back with a beer and a bucket of fried chicken.

Quit starving yourself, put down the botox needle and stop trying to be someone that you’re not, because these are the qualities that men are really looking for in a girlfriend:

A 6 or a 7 (out of 10)
Guys aren’t really looking for a 10. Why? Because any girl that’s a 10 is seriously high maintenance. Not only do they have to spend all their time lavishing her with compliments about her weight, her clothes, her hair and her overall appearance, but they also have to kiss her ass 24/7 because that’s what she is accustomed to.
These girls will only have sex in positions where they look good and are just looking for people to give them attention or praises. No point for these. 

Drama Free
It’s no surprise that guys hate drama, while most girls tend to be surrounded by that shit. Drama stems from gossip, backstabbing and general bitching – all things girls have a PhD in. While this is a commonly accepted phenomenon, no man wants to be with a girl who is all drama, all the time. If every day with a girl is like living on the set of a bad soap opera – ain’t nobody got time for that.

Sense of Humor
Guys enjoy a girl with a sense of humor, who’s not afraid to crack a dirty joke or even make fun of themselves.  I’m not saying that just being funny will send guys flocking to you – if that’s the case Kathy Griffin and Joan Rivers would probably have a man harem.

Women who come across as uptight or get too bothered by the little details are a turnoff to most men. They want a girl who they can bring out with their buddies, who can act like one of the boys, fitting in with their humor and who is sociable and fun to be around. Men want to relax during their downtime and not have to worry if one of his friends is going to say something that might offend his lady.

Communication
This one always surprises me. As women, we love to talk. We talk to our girlfriends constantly; we’re always on the phone to our mother, bitching to co-workers, complaining to our boss. WHY is it when it comes to relationships, these communication skills go straight out the window?!

How many times have girlfriends come to me complaining about how they’re pissed at their man because he’s fucked something up? And when I ask if they told their significant other why they’re pissed, the usual response is “No – he should already KNOW why I’m mad.”

Ah, are you dating a psychic? Can he read your mind? Unless you are, then here’s the kicker – no man is going to know you’re mad, or why you’re mad unless you actually tell him.

You want him to go down on you a certain way? Remember that most men are useless when it comes to eating girls out – vaginas are like a really hard Sudoku puzzle and no man can figure out the ideal combination. Some girls like two fingers here, one thumb in there and tongue going in a counterclockwise direction, other girls like a fist in once and just a knuckle in the other.

What I’m trying to say is that every girl is different, so if you want to enjoy sex and stop faking your orgasms, you need to communicate what you want.

Doesn’t Play Games
Playing hard to get is one thing, but play for too long and you’ll soon realize that you’ll end up being the only one in the game. Men don’t mind being the aggressor in a relationship; in fact, many men love the chase – but only to a certain extent.

They don’t want to feel like they’re being played and running in circles. You think ignoring calls and pretending you’re busy with guys you’re actually interested in makes them want you more and keeps them on their toes? Ah, no. It makes them think that you’re not interested and they’ll quickly move on.

If you like a guy, let him know! Seems simple, doesn’t it? Remember – guys aren’t very good at taking hints so make it obvious.

Grounds on love and second chances as sometimes, second chances are much better than new ones....

Love advice is usually simple when it comes to rekindling an old relationship: don´t. Indeed, there are many good reasons why getting back with someone you used to date is not a good idea; if it didn´t work before, it was for a good reason. However, there are cases when it isn´t that simple, and where the usual love advice may not hold true. Here are seven reasons for giving someone a second chance when the relationship has been over for a while or is not looking healthy.

1. GENUINELY REPENTANT

If someone treated you badly, but are now aware of that, then they have grown as a person. Forgiving someone who is genuinely sorry for how they behaved is good for you as well. If you can both do this, and there is still love between you, then giving them a second chance may lead to a more mature and fulfilling relationship.

2. LESSONS LEARNED

Generally one can apply these lessons to rekindle relationships, so that you can avoid making the same mistakes, but there are times, if both parties want to, that these lessons can be used to improve an existing relationship. You have to be willing to acknowledge where you went wrong, and to put in the effort towards improving things.

3. NOT BAD NEWS

We all know that some people should be kept at a distance – if you´ve had a partner who cheats, is violent or makes you unhappy, they should not be in your life, ever. If your ex is fundamentally a good person, though, there may be the possibility of making it work a second time round. Sometimes things don´t work because of circumstances, which may change and therefore allow the relationship to be rekindled.

4. MATURED

Lots of people aren´t really very mature, whatever their age, and that can make it difficult to be in a successful relationship with them. However, if they do mature, they can be much more ready to be with someone else. That person may still be you. If you feel the same way about them, then second time around may be quite different – or the same, yet much improved.

5. GOOD AT HEART

In spite of the idea that women like bad boys, I believe that the opposite is much more true. Sure, bad boys have their attractions, but what we really want, if we have any respect for ourselves, is a guy who treats us well and has a good heart. Nice guys really are attractive! So, someone whom you used to date and who is a decent person may be worth reconsidering if the possibility arises.

6. CHANGED CIRCUMSTANCES

Sometimes, relationships don´t work because of outside influences or situations. If that situation changes, then the barriers that caused the break-up may be irrelevant. Let´s say you move for job reasons, but can´t maintain a long-distant relationship. Then you move back, and your ex still lives in the same town. Or you were too young to make it work, but you meet up again years later and you´re both single. Maybe this time, it´ll work for you.

7. STRONG FEELINGS FOR EACH OTHER

When it comes to love advice, one thing is very important – do you still have strong feelings for each other? If one of you has moved on, then it will never work, however hard you try to rekindle things. But if you both still feel the same way, then there is a good chance that second time around things can be successful. It might not be easy to rebuild a relationship, but it can be done.

Of course, with love advice there are some things that should never be forgiven, however much you love someone. It would be foolish to get back with someone who had been violent towards you, for example. However, it is possible to make a go of things second time around; a lot of caution and changes may be needed, but just look at people who divorce, then realise that the divorce was the mistake, not the marriage. They then remarry successfully. What is the best piece of love advice you have ever been given?

Source: http://love.allwomenstalk.com/love-advice-grounds-for-giving-someone-a-second-chance

6 Reasons Why A Girl Can't Find A Nice Guy

By EMMI JACQUELINE 

Finally, a girl/woman has spoken up to shut the other girls/woman up about their complains on guys. Kudos to her on spelling out the real problem which actually is not from the guys, but from the girls. Here's how her blog went:

"I’ve heard plenty of girls bitch and complain about not being able to find a nice guy, whining about how all the good ones are taken or gay. I’ve even done it myself once or twice, or maybe even more but who’s counting. We have fallen into these traps and its time someone calls us out. To all the nice guys out there, I am so sorry for my previous behavior and the behavior of women everywhere. We have friend-zoned you, and held you up to impossible standards as I am sure those before and after us have as well. I can’t promise you nice guys this will never happen again, but I can call out those of us who have done these things.

So ladies, this is for you:

You friend zone all the nice ones.

When you finally find a guy that actually a decent human, you almost automatically put him in the friend zone. You leave him hanging there in friendship limbo and wanting you and wanting more.

If a guy is giving you attention and is nice, it means he is interested in you, its not that complicated. He likes you and probably wants more than listening to you bitch about how you can’t find a nice guy. Then you say things like “why can’t I find a nice guy like you?” As he listens, his heart slowly breaks into a million and one pieces because he knows that he can offer you everything you are looking for and more if given the chance. But when confronted with the fact that your best guy friend maybe the nicest guy, you will say that you value his friendship and don’t want to risk losing it all. At this point, he is quietly banging his head against the wall because you make no sense.

You have unrealistic expectations.

You have set your expectations too high. Sure, we all would love to find a guy who has at least a 6-figure salary, his own place, a great personality and a fantastic relationship with his mother. He is just over 6 feet tall with a full head of hair, no previous relationship baggage and can cook very well.

Ideally, he also loves to travel and can speak more than two languages. He enjoys the things you do and loves dogs, children and your strange family. Unfortunately for us women, these men make up only about 10% of the population and half of them are gay. Sure you might get lucky and find one, but the reality is you might not. There are tons of nice guys who might not be rich and are only 5’7”, and they are super sweet and willing to do anything for the right lady.

You end up with a fixer upper.

Everything about the guy is just right, except for one fatal flaw and all you want to do is fix it so he can be perfect. You can’t accept him for who he is, you just want to fix him to make him perfect in your eyes. So what if he has a messy closet, will you really be spending time in there? Women are constantly demanding to be accepted, as they are, warts and all. But once the tables are turned, the projects begin. We’ve all done this, the “he would be perfect if…” We need to love someone for who they are and who they can become, not for what we think we can make them if we are lucky.

You equate asshole personalities with masculinity.

There, I said it. As many problems as there are with cultural portrayals of women, there are just as many problems with the portrayals of men.

Somewhere in the development of popular culture, the ideal man became the asshole. He isn’t the smartest or the nicest but he is superiorly good looking and doesn’t seem to care. Whether it is reality TV or something scripted, the nice guy is almost never the cool/masculine guy. Look at any teen movie or show, it is always the best friend that is the nice guy and the “cool asshole” is who the girl wants to be with, ignoring the nice guy and friend zoning him (See reason #1).

We’ve been conditioned to believe that asshole and masculinity go hand in hand, the same why that we’ve been conditioned to strive for unrealistic beauty ideals (which is a completely different story).

You look in all the wrong places.

Very rarely do you meet the man of your dream at 2 am on a Friday night in some 24-hour diner when you are drunk. The man showing off in the VIP section probably doesn’t care whom you are, as long as you have nice tits. The frat star buying you shot after shot most likely doesn’t want to you to meet his mom. And the guy who drags you to the after hours strip club isn’t the type you take home for the holidays. Looking for love at the bar or the club isn’t the best idea. These are great places if you are looking for a physical relationship, but maybe not if you are looking a kind and caring partner.

Try talking to the guy reading in the coffee shop or flirting with the one who walks his dog past your apartment building everyday. You want the type of guy whose weekend plans are more substantial than “drink, drunk, sleep, smoke, repeat.”

It’s not him, it’s you.

Turns out, one of the reason you can’t find a nice guy is because you are a shallow person. This is similar to having too high expectations, but it’s a little more personal. You love to gossip and have no problem stabbing people in the back just to make sure you get your way. You put material possessions and physical appearances above all else, making it almost impossible to please you without an exotic sports car and designer labels to match.

No wonder you can’t find a nice guy, because you aren’t looking for a nice guy. You are looking for some arm candy or to be arm candy and a lot of the time that comes without the nice personality you claim to crave."

Source: http://thoughtcatalog.com/emmi-jacqueline/2013/12/6-possible-reasons-you-cant-find-a-nice-guy/

10 Things To Remember When Everything Seems To Be Going Wrong

Problems and heartaches in life are inevitable. However, there are some things to remember when you’re right in the thick of it that can help you get through it. When everything seems to be going wrong, practice telling yourself these things.

1. This Too Shall Pass

Sometimes life’s rough patches feel like they’re going to last forever. Whether you’re dealing with work-related issues, family problems, or stressful situations, very few problems last for a lifetime. So remind yourself, that things won’t be this bad forever.

2. Some Things are Going Right

When things are going wrong, it’s hard to recognize what is going right. It’s easy to screen out the good things and only focus on the bad things. Remind yourself that some things are going right. Purposely look for the positive, even if it is something very small.

3. I Have Some Control

One of the most most important things to remember is that you have some control of the situation. Even if you aren’t in complete control of the situation, one thing you can always control is your attitude and reaction. Focus on managing what is within your control.

4. I Can Ask for Help

Asking for help can be hard sometimes. However, it’s one of the best ways to deal with tough situations. Tell people what you need specifically if they offer to help. Don’t be afraid to call on friends and family and ask them for help, whether you need financial assistance, emotional support, or practical help.

5. Much of This Won’t Matter in a Few Years

Most of the problems we worry about today won’t actually matter five years from now. Remind yourself that whatever is going wrong now is only a small percentage of your actual life. Even if you’re dealing with a major problem, like a loved one’s illness, remember that a lot of good things are likely to happen in the course of a year or two as well.

6. I Can Handle This

A lack of confidence in handling tough times can add to stress. One of the best things to remember is that you can handle tough situations. Even though you might feel angry, hurt, disappointed, or sad, it won’t kill you. You can get through it.

7. Something Good Will Come Out of This

No matter how bad a situation is, it’s almost certain that something good will come out of it. At the very least, it’s likely that you will learn a life lesson. Perhaps you learn not to repeat the same mistake in the future or maybe you move on from a bad situation and find something better. Look for the one good thing that can result when bad things happen.

8. I Can Accept What’s Out of my Control

There are many things that aren’t within your control. You can’t change the past, another person’s behavior, or a loved one’s health issues. Don’t waste time trying to force others to change or trying to make things be different if it isn’t within your control. Investing time and energy into trying to things you can’t will cause you to feel helpless and exhausted. Acceptance is one of the best way to establish resilience.

9. I Have Overcome Past Difficulties

One of the things to remember when you’re facing difficulties, is that you’ve handled problems in the past. Don’t overlook past difficulties that you’ve dealt with successfully. Remind yourself of all the past problems you’ve overcome and you’ll gain confidence in dealing with the current issues.

10. I Need to Take Care of Myself

When everything seems to be going wrong, take care of yourself. Get plenty of rest, get some exercise, eat healthy, and spend some time doing leisure activities. When you’re taking better care of yourself you’ll be better equipped to deal with your problems.

Source: http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/10-things-remember-when-everything-seem-going-wrong.html

8 Ways To Stay Calm and Cool (How to Be More Patient and Less Stressed)

Came by this article and thought that it would be great that people knew it. Seriously, I need it myself too.

Being in a hurry all the time drains your energy. Getting caught up in things beyond your control stresses you out. If you’d like to reduce stress and become calm and cool, put the following 8 steps into practice to be more patient.

1. Let Go.

This thing that seems like the end of the world right now? It’s not (promise).Stressing out about the situation you’re in won’t do any good because you’re already in it, so just let it go.

2. Breathe.

The next time you’re faced with a stressful situation that makes you want to hurry, stop what you’re doing for one minute and perform the following steps:

• Take five deep breaths in and out (your belly should come forward with each inhale).
• Imagine all that stress leaving your body with each exhale.
• Smile. Fake it if you have to. It’s pretty hard to stay grumpy with a goofy grin on your face.

Feel free to repeat the above steps every few hours at work or home if you need to.

3. Loosen up.

After your breathing session, perform a quick body scan to identify any areas that are tight or tense (Clenched jaw? Rounded shoulders? Anything else that isn’t at ease?). Gently touch or massage any of your body parts that are under tension to encourage total relaxation (it might help to imagine you’re in a place that calms you: a beach, hot tub, or nature trail, for example).

4. Chew slowly.

Slow down at the dinner table if you want to learn to be patient and lose weight. Shoveling your food down as fast as you can is a surefire way to eat more than you need to (and find yourself with a bellyache). Be a mindful eater who pays attention to the taste, texture, and aroma of every dish. Chew slowly while you try to guess all of the ingredients that were used to prepare your dish. Chewing slowly will also reduce those dreadful late-night cravings that sneak up on you after work.

5. Enjoy the journey.

Focusing on the end result can quickly become exhausting. Chasing a bold, audacious goal that’s going to require a lot of time and patience? Split it into several mini-goals so you’ll have several causes for celebration. Giving yourself consistent positive feedback will help you grow patience, stay encouraged, and find more joy in the process of achieving your goals.

6. Look at the big picture.

The next time you find your stress level skyrocketing, take a deep breath, and ask yourself:

Will this matter to me…

• Next week?
• Next month?
• Next year?
• In 10 years?

Hint: No, it won’t. I bet most of the stuff that stresses you wouldn’t matter the next week (maybe not even the next day). Stop agonizing over things you can’t control, because you’re only hurting yourself.

7. Stop demanding perfection of yourself.

You’re not perfect and that’s okay. Show me a person who claims to be perfect and I’ll show you a dirty liar. Demanding perfection of yourself (or anybody else) will only stress you out, because it just isn’t possible.

8. Practice patience every day.

Below are a few easy ways you can practice patience every day, increasing your ability to remain calm and cool in the face of stress:

• The next time you go to the grocery store, get in the longest line.
• Instead of going through the drive-thru at your bank, go inside.
• Take a long walk through a secluded park or trail.

If you’d like to help your friends learn how to be more patient, pass this along so they can be calm and cool just like you. What helps you manage stress? Tell us in the comments.

Source: http://www.lifehack.org/articles/lifestyle/8-ways-stay-calm-and-cool-how-more-patient-and-less-stressed.html