It's quite a while i wrote anything here but since it is a holiday today, i was compelled to write something as I was having a group chat with some of my friends which I believe is many people's problem these days. Yup, i said it, EXPECTATIONS.
Don't get me wrong, expectations is also good in a way because it drives a person to excel or push a person to achieve something in life. But what if it's an overwhelming expectation? It can come from the person himself/herself or it can also come from other people. Majority of the time, it's expectations from other people and people live on other people's expectations. Be it expectations from friends, family members, colleagues, bosses, loved ones and etc. The most fearful one is living an overwhelming expectation from family members and one's self.
Ever heard of expectations from family members such as from your parents that the child must be this and that, must find a same status person to get married and etc. The list goes a long way for this. Most of the time, being raised up by that parent, the child adopts that thinking that their parents is correct. Yes, that's normal as a child will always look up to their parents. Hence, having these kind of expectations really can detriment a person or a child's life. We hear of so many cases of suicides these days because of the pressure coming from parents, the crazily overwhelming expectations from them. I mean, is that worth it? A number of them survive this crazy pressure of expecation, but many fold and turn to suicide or other ways to remove themselves from the pain.
Nowadays, people want the "top of the cream" stuff (deliberate bolding of the word "stuff"). I mean yes, who doesn't. Putting pressure and expectations to themselves can probably boost them to achieve those stuff. It's good to have a little pressure in life so that one can drive themselves to be better. Now, what's bad here is when a person has overwhelming expectations on other people, especially on the people who loves them such as wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend and etc. Worst is when their loved ones are pushed extremely hard with expectations just because that person who expects wants to show off to their circle of friends or even plainly do not have the patience to wait. Just too many of these cases where one side expects too much and the other just can't deliver. Would anyone feel happy? I bet all my chips on this that nobody will be. It's more of "one-way" business if that happens in any relationship or couple (be it married or not).
Personally and i've also seen it with my very own eyes that when an individual or a couple helps each other out and putting down overwhelming expectations, they achieve more than their wildest dreams. This is very simple and very logical. When there is LOW STRESS in couples, doesn't matter from which side, the more collaboration a couple can build. In a couple, it's like a team. It's no longer an individual game. If one side is just only demanding and taking, the other will soon burn out and fall off. I normally call these demanding and only taking people, LEECHES/PARASITES. Hence, when a couple puts down overwhelming expectations on each other, they know that they have each other's back in every aspect be it moral, energy, time and monetary support. It will be like, if one knows that the partner is having trouble in monetary, then the other partner should at least help up abit on doing some payment on other things instead of putting the entire load to the one that has problems monetarily. I have seen that when one does that for their partner, the partner will be very happy and will work even harder to give more to the partner who helped. Hence, they will strive together and achieve more without feeling stressed. Of course, i'm not talking about TOTAL no stress because that's impossible.
I believe people should put down overwhelming expectations on themselves and also on other people to achieve more and be a happier person/couple. Ultimately, our life in this world is not very long. So why live a stressful life and chase "fools gold" and forgo what you have beautifully in front of you? Embracing and be thankful of what you already have now, will definitely have a better outcome than pressuring people with overwhelming expectations. As the saying goes:
Good things come to those who wait,
Better things come to those who don't give up,
The best things come to those who believe.
Happy Holidays. :)
